Archive for September, 2011

I feel sadly inadequate.

My in-laws were here for two weeks and I feel as if they left on a sour note. Like we didn’t have a lot of fun or at least not the type of fun I was looking forward to during their visit. I feel like I let them down.

The visit was filled with stress: Mc’s car breaking down on the way home, our water main leaking, the house leaking, lack of funds. Luckily it all worked out.

Not to say that there wasn’t fun involved. Some laughter, joking, playing of games, reading of the newspaper and such. It just wasn’t the quality of fun I wished would have happened.
I love my in-laws. They are wonderful people, always bending over backwards to help and love us.
I just wish it could have been a better trip for them.


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Poor little Penny

I’m sad to say Penny didn’t make it. I came out yesterday to find her dead in her cage. I don’t know what got her. She looked healthy enough all the way up to the day I found her dead. 😦
I would have done a necropsy but my in-laws were here and I didn’t want to make my mother in law squeamish. I have been looking in on the others and so far they look good.

We think it was one of two things wrong. Recently I noticed she had spider eggs nestled in the tops of her cage and I cleaned them out. Perhaps I missed one. I don’t know.
Something went wrong with the pregnancy.

I am still going to sanitize the cage with a mixture of bleach and water before I use it again.
Just in case she was sick.

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Great News

Great News!!!!
J.J. Got into College! He is scheduled to start in October. I’m so proud of him!!!!

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Well here we are …

This week my in-laws will be arriving – Wednesday I think. They will be staying for two weeks! My son is also driving in this weekend so it can be a complete family get-together. Well not complete, My sister, brother-in-law and niece will be sorely missed.

Usually I am excited and full of energy when they come to visit but this year it seems more along the run-down and frustrated lines. sigh. I pray that I am able to change my focus before they get here. It’s not good to greet your in-laws with nothing but apprehension roiling in your stomach.

On a bright bit of news, their impending arrival means that certain things get cleaned, tossed, rearranged and set up! The carpets have been shampooed, the gutters cleaned, the floors done and my display vacuumed!
I plan on taking it one day at a time. Neither one of us have money to spare so maybe we can find something to make it relaxing. games? We have Wii golf? Maybe that will take care of some of it.

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Have you ever felt that way? Just packing up, heading out to the farthest reaches of the farthest land, a good 20 miles from anybody. That’s where I’m at, spiritually/mentally. Solitude, prayer, fasting or even just simple introspection – I don’t know.

I feel boxed in, confined, trapped, and over all stifled. It’s not any one person or event that is causing my angst. Maybe it does have to do with finances, obligations, and restrictions, or maybe it is simply that time of the year where cooler temperatures are accompanied by whispered yearnings of freedom.

Whatever is causing it, that is my state of mind today.

Finite moments of doubt looking for immediate gratification, urging me to sell the animals, pack my bags and start walking. Pushing me to live life on one great adventure into the unknown. Instead, I am searching the internet for hotels and cabins in Maine. Planning our vacation for next June, hoping to assuage the urges with a promise and the construction of a plan.

It has been a while since I’ve added gratitudes to the bottom of my page. Since my peace of mind is failing, I think it is time that I start back up again.

I am sooooooo grateful for my life, for Hubby’s job which pays all our bills, for my support for my writing so that one day I can pay the bills and the hubby can quit, For all the multitude of blessings that I have at my fingertips that no one even really thinks about anymore. Internet connection, indoor plumbing, a car for every family, an abundance of everything clothes, shoes, water, food, hairstyle products, soaps, medical care.. So much in fact that we have choices (sometimes too many). We have laws that protect the people, medical care to treat the sick, schooling to educate the young and old alike. We are soo very blessed.
Sometimes, I lose sight of it all. Sometimes, I wallow in pity for what we don’t have, or what I want and can’t have, yet.
That is why I write the gratitudes. To actively put on paper (or on the internet in this case) the things that i often dismiss as normal or common place. Things that are so precious to our livestyle that we wouldn’t know how to live without.

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Farm update

In-laws are coming in soon and I was hoping that I’d have more done.

Had a horrible bout of respiratory infection with the chickens. Even though we put them on antibiotics, we still lost quite a few. I was very concerned that it would spread to the new ones that just started laying. there are one or two left that just don’t seem to be coming back strong and I’m going to have cull them. One of my Silver Lace are in that bunch. 😦

Sammie ended up with an ear canker that cost me $140 dollars but it’s cleared up pretty well. We bred the girls on the 21st (fingers crossed). They should kindle on the 20th of September. I am expecting approximately 6 babies per doe.

I have already cut back the tomato plants – they didn’t produce well at all in the topsy-turvys. The peppers and strawberries are making a comeback though. I will more than likely keep those going next year.
My asparagus is doing GREAT! it loves the area I put it in. I even have seeds. How cool is that?
The horseradish is touted as an aggressive species but it doesn’t seem to be doing much of anything. We’ll see next year.
I have cut back the lemon balm and the berry bushes, in preparation for the winter.
The sunchokes are being bedded down this winter in heavy mulch and compost, in the hopes that next year I can harvest.

Something ate all my grapes, but I’ll have better luck next time.

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Rye-apple cake!!!

OMG! Flavor-wise, on a scale of 1-10, this cake is a 9 or 10! Hold together and Look pretty wise It equals more of a 2 or 3. So, My advice to all of you… eat it with a spoon.

We got the original recipe here and hubby did all the translating.

1 Medium apple – Peeled, cored and diced
Ground cinnamon sprinkled over apple – to taste
1/4th cup Almonds ground
3/4 cup of Rye flour
1/8th cup sliced almonds for topping
6 TBSP butter
2 Tsp baking powder
1/4th cup of Agave light syrup or Light golden syrup
1/2 cup dark brown sugar
3/8th cup of milk

1. Preheat oven to 334 F
2. Peel, core and dice apple
3. Dust with cinnamon
4. Combine ground almonds, flour, and baking powder in bowl
5. Heat butter, syrup and sugar until sugar melts
NOTE: Do not allow the mixture to simmer – it must stay a low heat
6. Remove from heat and add milk and egg to mixture
7. add dry ingredients
8. Fold over/in apples and pour into greased baking dish/tin
9. Bang tin to dislodge any air bubbles
10. Bake for 35 to 40 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean
11. Cut when cold

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